Frank Barnhill, M.D.

A thirty five year old young lady visited my office because she felt stressed after being on vacation for two weeks.  She thought she’d had a great vacation and looked forward to her next.  The kids had fought like cats and dogs on the way home, but she expected that.  They were tired and cranky from being out half the night.   The amusement park didn’t close until 1 am and then there were fireworks.  She came home and felt since she thought she was rested, she cut grass, trimmed hedges, cleaned the house and washed the car, all in one day.  Everyone else took a nap.  When she got into bed that night, she was really more tired than usual and couldn’t sleep.  She had been back to work for two days and felt so much stress, that she was crying during her visit.  There was a stack of paperwork on her desk two hundred pages deep.  She was so depressed and anxious, she put her garbage can on top of the desk and stuck a sign on it, “In file”.   Then she went to the bathroom and hid for an hour, to cry.

This seems to be a contradiction in terms, being stressed, depressed and just coming back from vacation.  It may surprise you to discover nearly 30% of all of us dread going on vacation or returning from vacation.  Doesn’t make any sense does it? After all, a vacation is supposed to be designed for rest, relaxation, recreation, and emotional and physical rejuvenation.  Isn’t it?

Well, the key word here is designed.  You must design or plan for your vacation to meet those goals of the three “R’s” and E&P.  How do you plan, you ask? Here are a few tips to help you plan your vacation so that you won’t leave with a case of the dreads, and return home to face post vacation blues.

Start planning your vacation at least a month in advance if possible.  This will give you time to pay bills that will be due while you’re gone.  You could even write the checks and get a friend or relative to mail them on time.

Nothing can ruin a vacation faster than to remember you forgot to pay the light bill and it’s due on your fourth day at Myrtle Beach.

Make arrangements for someone to check the house, get mail and newspapers and handle emergencies at least two weeks in advance.

Do all housecleaning and yard work the week before you leave home.  Don’t put it off for when you come back.  The same is true of office work.  Go ahead and answer all those letters and file those papers.  Don’t put off important decisions.  You will just end up worrying about that unfinished work for your entire vacation.  All that needless brain activity will occupy your mind and spoil your fun, creating tension and dread for what you have waiting on you when you return home or to work.

Budget your entire trip and add 20% for good measure, at least one month in advance.   Nothing spoils and shortens a vacation more than running short of money.

Make reservations for airline tickets, rental cars, hotels, tours, restaurants, and special recreation as far in advance as feasible.  This is especially true if you are taking the kids.  Just think how a whiney, sleepy, hungry 5 year old will get on your nerves while standing in line for an hour at a rental car lot.

Plan ahead for bad weather.  If it rains all day at Disney World, are you going anyhow?   Will you cut the day short?  Maybe you will need to have an alternate type of entertainment.   Remember the 5 year old in line at the rental car place?  Think about being in a 12 by 20 foot hotel room for 12 hours.  This happened to us on several occasions.  Making arrangements for video games, in-room movies and a side trip to an indoor miniature golf course helped get us through the day.

Plan for surprises for yourself and the family while away on vacation.  An on-vacation surprise could be an unexpected visit to a huge ice cream parlor for after supper treats.   We did that with the kids when they were 5, 8, and 11 years old.  The grandparents were with us, and no one but Ann and I knew we were going.  Hey, it was a great surprise.   If you’re away by yourself, surprise yourself with a massage or meal at a very good restaurant.  I’m sure you can think of more great surprises.

Be sure that each member of your family takes back a memento of the trip.  It needs to be something that will remind them of a good part of your vacation and can be displayed where it is seen every day.  You can buy a custom picture frame and display a picture of the whole family at Universal Studios on your desk at work.  Every time you see it, you’ll be reminded of all the good times.

Spend the day before you come home doing low impact things.  Play around the pool, watch a movie, but don’t try to cram too much into that last day.  This is a very common mistake as everybody wants to get the most out of their vacation.  It actually creates more stress than it’s worth.  If you get in at midnight and have to get up at 6 am to leave, you didn’t do yourself a favor.

Avoid eating heavy meals on the evening before you come home.  The kids will be less likely to get car sick when the get the “going home jitters” and you won’t have to cleanout the mess.

Organize the trip home as thoroughly as you did the trip to your vacation destination.   If you’re not prepared to leave, then the trip home will be terrible.  When Ann and I took out kids to Disney World, we rode past all the park areas on the way to Interstate 4 and let the kids say “bye” and “we’ll see you real soon!” Leave for home on a happy note and with feelings that you’ll be happy to return later.

On the way back home, talk about all the good things that happened and how much fun you had.   Try to forget the bad events, unless you can turn them into funny happenings.

When you finally get back home, invite friends and family to look at your pictures or listen to your adventures while on vacation.  A vacation that others wish they had been on is worth its weight in gold.  After all, no one wants to admit they chose to go on a bad vacation.